Conscious Breakups: Moving on without the Baggage
Here’s the thing, relationships breakup. Not every person that you date or get in a relationship with is going to be Mr. or Mrs. Right. Would you like to know how to have a conscious breakup and end a relationship without hard feelings and baggage?
Here are five key steps to a conscious breakup:
1. Be compassionately real.
You don’t have to be mean or hurtful to be honest and real.
Don’t hide the truth from you or your soon-to-be ex.
2. Own your feelings.
You don’t have to share them all with your soon-to-be ex, but you can’t stuff them if you want to move on completely and cleanly. You have to feel what you feel and let it go. (That doesn’t mean distracting yourself until you numb yourself out or forget the challenging feelings, that only leaves them stuck until they pop-up in your next relationship.)
3. Acknowledge your contribution to the challenges.
It’s never all their fault. It takes two to tango. It might be hard to hear and you both contributed to everything great about the relationship. And, everything not so great about the relationship.
4. Acknowledge and honor the best in your ex.
We are all good at our core, and we’re all doing the best that we can.
Your ego may not think so, but it’s absolutely true. Find what’s great and acknowledge it.
5. Do a Conscious Endings ritual.
I formally teach this to my clients, but you can create any ritual that allows you to let go of old hurts between you so that you don’t carry them forward into your next relationship.
When you do your ritual, be sure to include gratitudes, blessings, and forgivenesses for both you and your ex.
Here’s one last very important thing to note. Not everyone is committed to a conscious ending. Your ex does not have to participate. You can do this fully and completely on you own (or with the help of a facilitator.) It doesn’t matter how you do it. Just do it. Do it for you.
Complete for you… and your future relationship.
If moving through heartache feels challenging and you want to make sure you are completely complete… so that you are open and ready to fully love and be loved in the future… I’d be honored to support you. Conscious completions is one of my specialities.
In love, light and ecstasy,
*At Ecstatic Intimacy, an all-inclusive website for singles and couples, we welcome all sexual orientation(s), gender(s) and relationship expressions. In this article we utilize the pronouns he/she/him/her.