Dating Meaning: What Dating is and What it isn’t

Giving the very misunderstood word “dating” a clear meaning will help us unravel some of the challenges that plague singles, and some couples too. The experience of dating, of courting and being courted, plays a key role in all healthy romantic relationships. Most of us clearly consider dating a means to an end when it comes to finding a romantic partner. Yet it’s more than that. 

With its importance in romantic connections, both singles and couples will want to learn to date well. Singles also want to realize that dating as a single may look and feel similar to dating as a couple. Yet, the underpinnings of dating inside and outside of a relationship differ significantly.

Let’s explore the essence of the meaning of dating and then consider how you can become masterful at it… in relationship or in seeking relationship. 

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What is the meaning of dating?

Dating done well has the capacity to kindle attraction and build intimacy. As a matter of fact, the purpose of dating, whether single or in a relationship, is to ignite and sustain that magnetic pull that keeps a couple drawn together in strong connection. Dating incorporates the many experiences that keep the spark of newness alive from the first date through decades of marriage. When people get lazy and forget the real meaning of dating when it comes to the long term quality, success, and satisfaction of a relationship both people suffer undue heartache, whether just getting to know each other or whether living together for decades. 

In its simplest definition, dating means spending social, recreational, and engaging time with a person of romantic interest, or at least of potential romantic interest. If we put a bit of a mathematical frame on it, dating is made up of a series of discontinuous social interactions. Dates have a clear beginning and ending with no fixed interval between them. There is no guarantee of another and dating typically, and most ideally, happens with more than one person at a time. 

Singles in particular too often confuse dating and relationships. The meaning of dating for singles has an additional purpose in that it allows people to explore the possible fit that might exist between them for a long term relationship. Dating for singles is a selection process. Yet unfortunately many singles who enjoy a great date with one person immediately want to focus exclusively on that one person and not open themselves up to other dates. This puts undue and sabotaging pressure on the two people dating and the dates themselves. When someone wants to exclusively date one person they attempt to turn dating into a relationship much too quickly.

Dating serves as a time to get to know one another (and yes, couples you need to continue to get to know one another) and build intimacy through closeness. The best date activities invite an interaction between the two people that supports each of them in revealing more about themselves, witnessing the authenticity of the other, and ideally flirting in a way that allows their masculine or feminine sexual essences to dance with each other. 

Dating doesn’t mean you have to share any specific types of activities. As we said, the heart of dating is connecting, is sharing an experience. Quality dating has the potential and capacity to build both the physical and emotional intimacy that masculine and feminine beings tend to respectively crave.  

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What is the meaning of dating in a relationship?

When we look at the meaning of dating in a relationship in contrast to singles dating we don’t see a significant difference in the activities and experiences. The purpose of dating in a relationship remains the same: to enjoy each other’s company, to flirt, to court, and to help keep the spark of attraction alive. 

Dating in relationship obviously doesn’t hold the specific purpose of selecting a romantic partner that singles dating does. However, if we’re honest, couples actually need to keep choosing each other over and over again. Too often, people in long term relationships can find themselves feeling stuck, sometimes unhappy, forgetting that they still have a choice in their partner. Yes, even if you’re married you have choice and remembering choice gives both partners a sense of self empowerment. 

Dating in relationships, having fun together, going deeper in your intimate connection helps keep the joy of being together alive. Regular great dates for long term couples can help us feel “Wow… I’m still so in love with this person,” or “Oh yeah, my partner is still hot!” Those experiences feed the soul of a relationship. 

In order to maintain the physical intimacy that matters in a relationship, couples need to flirt with each other. They need to play together and giving our dating meaning and purpose through play, spontaneity and discovery together will surely serve to keep that physical attraction alive. It’s really too easy for long term couples to get caught up in the day to day activities of life, kids, work and home care. Yet, you don’t want your dating experiences to become a thing of the past because couples who stop dating and flirting may often find themselves losing both emotional connection and sexual interest. 

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How to become masterful at attraction and connection 

In dating, whether single or partnered, most pairs will want to consider the yin yang meaning in love, or in other words the masculine feminine energy dynamic between them. These opposite energies play an essential role in both the initial and sustained attraction between couples. When it comes to dating, it’s especially important to realize that how you actually plan and invite someone on a date, even if you’re married, has a significant impact on the attractive forces that can be ignited on a date.

Specifically, you’ll want to remember that a more feminine being will want to be courted, or asked out on a date, while a more masculine being will be inspired to court, or to ask another out and plan a date. On the other hand, when those energies find themselves reversed in the two dating people where a more feminine being feels the need to court her partner or a more masculine being feels himself being pursued, this reversal of sexual polarity may actually have a diminishing effect on sexual attraction.

So if you truly understand the purpose and meaning of dating, you’ll want to know how to make your dates optimal and most exciting for both people. Be sure you learn how to and feel confident flirting with your date. This simple yet powerful act alone has the capacity to ignite ongoing sexual chemistry.

Additionally, for singles, understanding the difference between dating and having a relationship and knowing when dating becomes a relationship will help you develop mastery at dating.

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Remember dating is a lifelong process. Date like your relationship depends on it… because it does. 

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Since 2006, highly conscious men and women, with a commitment to extraordinary relationships, have chosen Ecstatic Intimacy to find and cultivate Soul Partnerships from their bedrooms to their boardrooms. Ecstatic Intimacy believes in coveted relationships, for all. 

You too, are invited…