Puritanical Beginnings

Sex, always a hot topic, always a hidden topic, makes some of us excited and aroused while making others squirm in discomfort. It’s as if we love sex and hate it all at the same time. Although the topic of sex now hits mainstream TV programs like Good Morning American and CNN news, it still carries a huge stigma with it. Most of us have some kind of conditioning within us that says “sex is, at least in some part, dirty or bad.” With all the stereotypes, the abuse, the pornography, and negative conditioning, who could imagine sex being a blessed, sacred, joyful celebration of our humanness?

This must change. Healthy sexual expression and fulfillment are critical success factors in creating the peace, love, and ecstasy we all desire in relationship. Sexual expression is a fundamental piece of our human nature and we must remove the layers of darkness that have overlaid it. Accepting, and more importantly embracing, our sexuality will change the face of relationships dramatically.

In this chapter, readers will recognize how our judgments and the puritanical expectations of society have limited our potential for true love and intimacy. Using exercises and contemplative suggestions, readers will discover the beliefs that create conflict within them. It will help them finally make peace between the parts of themselves that love and crave sexual expression and the parts of them judge it, fear it, unconsciously resist it, or feel somehow tainted by it.

Humans are one of the few species with the ability to experience pleasure during sex. We are blessed. Whether you believe in God, creation, the universe, or evolution, we have been gifted bodies with sexual desires and pleasures. It’s time to accept that, embrace it, enjoy it and celebrate it!

Each and every one of us , even if you’ve never experienced it, has an immense capacity for pleasure and I invite you, just for a moment, to set aside your religious and societal beliefs and any sexual wounding you may have. Without all of that hanging over your head, doesn’t the idea of a deeply intimate connection combined with waves of physical pleasure sound blissful?

Many of you are emphatically saying, “YES!” while others, who may be more like I was, might be cautiously saying, “Maybe…” Where ever you are is perfect. If the idea of “bliss in the bedroom” sounds even remotely appealing to you then let’s explore how we can open ourselves to our fullest sexual potential and enjoyment while feeling free of guilt, fear, and shame.


In love, light and ecstasy,

Joanna Shakti

*At Ecstatic Intimacy, an all-inclusive website for singles and couples, we welcome all sexual orientation(s), gender(s) and relationship expressions. In this article we utilize the pronouns he/she/him/her.

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