soul connection

Soul Connection: Understanding the Power, Blessings, and Challenges

A soul connection, by definition brings something meaningful to our life. But more than meaningful, it often brings an essential element necessary for our fulfillment on this journey of being human. The power and purpose of a soul connection may be revealed quite quickly. It can be complete within a few minutes, yet other times a soul connection reveals its deepest purpose over a lifetime relationship.

What is a soul connection? Well, first let’s define what is a soul? Every human being has a soul and that soul is unique to each individual. In other words, every person has a unique reason and purpose for being on this planet right now. Our soul represents the unique qualities, expressions, and gifts we are each born with and that only we ourselves can bring to the world. With that, our soul also has specific lessons to learn such that it can fully embody, express, and give its gifts to humanity.

That’s where soul connections come in. Our soul connections are designed to help us evolve our souls and actualize its greatest gifts. While most people believe that soul connections are purely beautiful and magical, that happens to be one of the fallacies that causes us undue pain. The truth is that yes, all soul connections have a divine magic to them, and those connections are not always easy or comfortable, at least not all the time.  

This is why too many people walk away from soulmate relationships. Soulmates is another way to describe lasting soul connections. Soulmates tend to come together for longer periods of time, sometimes in the form of lifetime romantic relationships, in order to serve each other’s souls. In a moment we’ll explore the special qualities and challenges of these important romantic soul connections. 

Beyond romantic connections, we will also over the course of our lives experience many different types of soul connections and each one of those connections will offer something important to our life’s journey. The question is will we have the courage to accept the gift? Will we make the commitment to walk this courageous soul path?


Signs of a soul connection

While not every soul connection will appear in the same way or feel the same in our bodies, we can identify some common signs of a soul connection. Depending on the type and purpose of the soul connection, some of these signs may apply and several may not. As Brian Chalker says in his poem, some come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. 

In particular, those short, sweet, often potent and short-lived “reason” connections may only reveal a couple of the signs. On the other hand, those with lifetime soul connection relationships may experience many of these signs over the years. 

It bears repeating as we look at the signs of a soul connection that these soul encounters don’t always feel good. They are not meant to always feel good. And that is the most common misunderstanding when it comes to soulmates and soul connections. 

Soul connections are not always supposed to sweep us off our feet and make us smile. They too are designed to make us uncomfortable, to make us stretch, to call us out of comfortable hiding places, to bring light to our shadows, and to invite us to become all of who we are meant to be. 

So pay close attention to the feel good signs and the uncomfortable yet powerful signs so that you don’t walk away from important soul relationships before they are complete.


The feel good signs

  1. You hold similar things precious and important in life; you hold similar values, passions or purposes
  2. They quickly feel familiar, as if you’ve known them for a long time. You often experience a sense of “home” when with them
  3. You feel an inexplicable draw towards them
  4. You feel understood with little explanation
  5. You experience a sense of awe or wonder around them
  6. They see and celebrate you, often better than you see and celebrate yourself
  7. You experience a sense of alignment which creates a sense of trust, even in the most challenging moments
  8. It feels like your relationship has a bigger purpose even if you’re not sure what that purpose is; you just sense a power in your relationship
  9. They bring out the best in you

The uncomfortable, yet powerful signs

  1. They are masters at pushing your buttons. 
  2. They irritate, frustrate, or annoy you to significant levels 
  3. They want or do the very opposite of what you want or do
  4. They invite you to stretch your comfort zones
  5. Directly or indirectly, they challenge you to be more of who you truly are
  6. You sometimes want to run to escape the power and discomfort of your connection 
  7. They bring out the worst in you

It might seem like you want to steer clear of everyone in the second category, yet this is where the potency of and potential for unconditional love exists. That potential is one of the greatest lessons every soul is here to learn. 

Our soul connections teach us about love – love of self, love of other, love of all. 

Let’s also be clear that while the challenging people who show up in your life are truly soul connections, that does not mean they need to be there for long, certainly not for a lifetime or even a season. Some of the challenging soul connections arrive to teach us self love, self honor, and self respect. They arrive to help us stop the harm of self abandonment. They come into our lives to invite us to stand up for ourselves and claim our true power while remaining open to love. Soul connections might be here to teach us the difference between healthy vs unhealthy boundaries

As you pay attention to the signs, pay attention to your own body and being. Ask yourself, how is this soul connection in service to me? How am I in service to this soul? Then listen deeply. 


When you have a romantic soul connection 

Romantic soul connections carry a special power for each partner. Without a doubt any lasting romantic connection exists for the purpose of inviting and inspiring each partner to be all of who they were meant to be when they were born. 

Our romantic partners have the greatest potential to influence our soul’s growth. They have this power because they are usually the most intimate relationships we’ll ever have. Our romantic soul connections require us to meet not just romantically or physically, they invite us to unite heart, mind, body, spirit and soul. They invite us into divine union.

Yet, again, because of the potential depth, vulnerability, and hence intimacy of these soul partnerships, because they invite us to expose ourselves in naked authenticity, they carry the potential for both great pain and great pleasure, depending on how we approach them. 

Romantic soul connections reveal both our wonderfulness and our impossibleness. Said another way, our romantic soul connections have power because they ask us to reveal the beauty as well as the mess of our humanness. Of course they invite us to show our greatness, the parts of us that are so easy to fall in love with. Yet, they also encourage us to show the not-so-good sides of ourselves. They invite us to be fully real.

That kind of deep authentic soul intimacy asks us to love each other when it seems we least deserve it. As we said above, soul connections, and especially romantic soul connections, hold the profoundly important power to teach us deeply about love – most importantly about unconditional love of self and unconditional love of our partner.

It is why spiritual love and soul love teach us how conflict turns into communion if we stay open, present and authentic. Our strongest and most lasting bonds form when we walk through the challenges of our soul connection so that we may know the deepest benefits, the deepest of love. The rewards are profound. 


In short, a soul connection might show up as your future spouse and it might show up as someone to say no to and not include in your life, or anything in between. Your practice is to recognize soul connections, learn how to navigate them, nourish them when appropriate, and open yourself to both their blessings and their challenges. 

When we allow ourselves to step into them, soul connections create a crucible that reveals true authenticity, intimacy, and ecstasy – the foundational elements of the path soul love – within us, between us and beyond us. 

Soul connections may show up at times and in ways that we wholeheartedly welcome; they may also show up when we don’t know we’re ready. They may bring us gifts we didn’t know we needed or desired. Yet they have come to us to serve our deepest heart, our most profound love, and our greatest human joys. 

If you sense a soul connection and you don’t yet feel courageous enough to step into it, it’s ok. You can relax knowing that if we don’t accept an offering, if we’re not ready to receive the gift right now, life will bring us the opportunity again later. Maybe the next opportunity will happen with the same person, maybe with someone else. However, you can trust that life always conspires for your soul’s fulfillment. 


Since 2006, highly conscious men and women, with a commitment to extraordinary relationships, have chosen Ecstatic Intimacy to find and cultivate Soul Partnerships from their bedrooms to their boardrooms. Ecstatic Intimacy believes in coveted relationships, for all. 

You too, are invited…

*At Ecstatic Intimacy, an all-inclusive website for singles and couples, we welcome all sexual orientation(s), gender(s) and relationship expressions. In this article we utilize the pronouns he/she/him/her.

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4 Comments

  1. Edward Hirsch on November 27, 2022 at 9:29 pm

    Joanna, this was powerful and clear, thank you! You cover the wholeness and depth of the subject, which I so very much appreciate! This came to me in perfect timing, another factor in my appreciation of what you’re sharing!

  2. Kyte Munay on February 14, 2023 at 6:53 am

    Hi thank you for your article.
    I am an empath and intuitive as well as a healer so I’m already very sensitive to eneries. Yet roughly 3 weeks ago I was playing an online game, and decided to leave to start my business up again, and one of the people i had been talking to asked if we could stay chatting after i left game, so we connected on FB. He found out I was a healer , he is very much like me in many ways and in others we are opposites, complimentary I suppose, we started messaging on FB and I asked him to go and set an intention as he had never experienced a remote healing before. He has his own altar for rituals ect, so he went there, and all of a sudden there was a physical magnetic powerful energy thing happening, I can’t explain it properly but it was a physical sensation as well as on a deeper level as we both knew our souls had just communicated. I’m used to weird experiences but nothing like this pull of energy ever!! And so began an intense and profound communication between us, the sychronicities that happened I don’y think anyone would believe!! The trouble is , he is married, not happily as that is what I was supposed to be helping him with, spirtiually with the healing and guidance. We were honest with each other and said we would work our way through the intensity, hoping for a deep friendship to emerge. The intensity just grew. Oh i forgot to mention also I live in the UK and he lives in the US!!!! Please understand the ‘chemistry’ between us was not sexual it was so much more deeper than that but yeah we were and still are both loved up, we just know we are supposed to help each other grow spiritually. But a couple nights ago, It got to me, the fact that he is married, it goes against my principles, integrity. Seems he was in a muddle about that bit too, so we’ve decided to cut communication. It’s only been 2 days and OH does it hurt. If anyone out there had any advise for me as I’ve been looking everwhere, I would be most grateful. Are we supposed to just go with it regardless, he wants to meet me one day, I’ve told him we will push each others buttons and it wont be pretty, yet this time it feels different, from my last encounters of this nature but the soul connection, even though there with others was nothing like this, there is nothing else like this. I’m at a total loss as what to do. thankyou for taking the time to read my experience
    Kyte

    • Another soul on March 10, 2024 at 5:23 pm

      O yee Kyte,
      I am also info healing And other intuïtive stuff.
      The chemistry with a teatcher was hard to ignore. So extreme. My heart felt broken as I sad goodbye for the last (?) time.
      But then, the mind wants to have a story.
      It has been two Months now. I am getting better, over it. Feel the ‘nessecety’ is growing less From a spiritual point of view that feels healthy. Not to Cling to extrrnal things or people to Find happyness. But from a Personal point of view it is undiscribebly painfull (has been, not anymore, I knew this man for…4 years And have experienced every Intimate thing I can imagine.
      The focus may be in the now, And in being gratefull for the experiences (And expantions) far. My lesson: every feeling is allowed. Things do not need to be physical, to be wholly felt And learned from. And things come up our path whenever we need it, in the way that is appropriate.
      Have faith. There is no guilt in deep appreciation. The body does not have to be involved to ‘become’ happy And whole again with ourselfves.
      Greetings from a soul. namaste

  3. Lauren on March 19, 2024 at 9:12 am

    To Kyte and Another Soul,

    Thank you for your offerings and for sharing your soul connection experiences. Like you both, I am navigating a deep soul connection with a partner that has been deeply rewarding as it has been challenging. He and I were friends for two years and started dating last March. We’ve broken up twice, in that time…once for a week and this last time for a month. We bring out the best in each other and the worst. We reveal ourselves and each others deepest shadow work.

    After a month apart, which included a restraining order, that is no longer in place (never physical violence but threats of suicide from my partner, a very old and unresolved issue within himself), I reached out to him. Instantly, my soul felt back home. He did as well. We are attempting to navigate the path forward. We want to be together. We are living separately and feel each other even in this physically separate place. He asked why I was “pulling on him” last night. We are learning to read the signs and communicate in language what the sensations mean. We are both highly intelligent and very intuitive people with profound lessons to learn from each other. I’m learning how to be in connection, while he is learning how to be an individual in relationship. We are learning where our soul work is and to support each other on our journey together and as individuals.
    I would like to know, how do I “turn down” the volume on my energy? It is very intense and pulls at him quite strongly. Any recommendations on how to be more at ease and release a bit more would be quite helpful. Can one “turn down” the volume on a soul connection? Not to diminish it but to find more balance? I appreciate any feedback you have to offer.

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