spiritual intimacy

Spiritual Intimacy

Spiritual intimacy happens when two people share a connection beyond the realm of the physical body. This type of connection happens beyond the heart and the mind often rendering you unable to accurately describe the experience. It can be breathtaking, wordless and awe-inspiring. Spiritual intimacy often occurs when two people recognize and live in alignment with a great purpose for their relationship. They will find themselves carried into experiences of love, connection, joy and even physical pleasure that express in ways bigger and bolder than either might have previously imagined. 

Spiritual intimacy, like other forms of intimacy, commonly unfolds and deepens in romantic relationships and it is not by any means reserved for in-love couples. It does, however, happen between people who have a type of soul connection. It arises when both people open themselves to the unknown, the unexplained, and sometimes the incomprehensible. Yet, there is a way in which even in its indescribable nature, one or both people will feel and know the “rightness” of the connection and experience. 


What is spiritual intimacy?

Before we can answer the question “what does spiritual intimacy mean” we have to understand both spiritual and intimacy. Although there are many types of intimacy and ways of experiencing intimacy, the essential essence and meaning of intimacy is a sense of closeness and connection that ultimately creates an experience of unity. True intimacy dissolves all boundaries and hence collapses all sense of separation. 

If we then look at the meaning of spiritual, we’ll see that spiritual means the part of ourselves that is essential yet invisible, untouchable, unnameable. The word spiritual points to this that exists within each of us yet is bound by none of us.  

The word spiritual originates from the Latin word spiritus which means breath and correlates directly with the word inspire. Our inspiration, our breath, keeps us alive. We take our first breath and our last breath. Spirit is this that enters, or unites with the body, at birth and releases its union with the body at death. 

So what is spiritual intimacy? It is one of the 23 types of intimacy that brings us closer and unites us in the spiritual or sometimes referred to as the energetic and ethereal realms. 

Spiritual intimacy creates one of the most profound experiences of intimacy in that it truly does exist in a boundless realm and hence always connects us. Yet, we often can’t feel that connection. Many live decades, even a lifetime, without conscious awareness of it. 

We can’t touch it. We can’t point to it. We can’t define it or describe it. Yet we know, without a doubt, when we’re experiencing it. 


How to have spiritual intimacy

When exploring how to have spiritual intimacy, the most important thing for most Westerners to understand is the fact that your thinking mind won’t take you there. Likewise, the more you think about it, try to understand it, or try to create it, the less likely you’ll actually come into contact with it. 

You must develop your feeling senses, including your sixth sense that senses beyond the physical. You must explore and contemplate every belief you might hold that says we are limited to the form of the body. 

Who we are extends way beyond the body, but to the human eye and the human mind we appear limited. To experience and know spiritual intimacy we must begin to release that limited consciousness so that we can begin to touch it with our senses, even though we will never touch it with our hands. 

A powerful question, to ask yourself, taught by many of the great spiritual masters, is “Who am I?” And as you begin to explore that question beyond the confines of your mind, in your body, in your heart, you will start to see that who you are is that aliveness, that boundless unifying presence. 

In romantic or sexual relationships, Tantric practices invite us to use our breath, our inspiration, literally to create a felt experience of physical intimacy, spiritual intimacy, emotional intimacy, self-intimacy and so much more. Consciously connecting with your own breathing and then marrying that with conscious breathing between you and a partner offers the opportunity to see and feel this that extends beyond us, that that truly unites us. 

And, if you’re asking, “How do I know we’re experiencing spiritual intimacy?” You’ll know because it takes our breath away. It will render us speechless. It’s often accompanied by unexplained tears. Tears of wonder. Tears of joy. Tears of recognition.  


What is spiritual intimacy in sex?

Spiritual intimacy in sex brings us heart-to-heart and eye-to-eye with the essence of sacred sexuality, spiritual sexuality or Tantra. When we experience spiritual intimacy in sex we merge the experiences of several types of intimacy all at once, bringing us closer and closer to the sense of unity we all deep down crave as human beings. 

Spiritual intimacy in sex or spiritual sexuality unites our bodies, hearts and spirits simultaneously often resulting in exquisite ecstasy and profound sense of bliss.

Although we introduce the idea of spiritual intimacy in sex here, please remember that you do not need a sexual relationship to experience this kind of intimacy. You absolutely do not. You have the potential to experience spiritual intimacy in any relationship, in every relationship. It is not bound or limited by our hearts, although an open heart will certainly expand our access to it. 


Regardless of the form of relationship, spiritual intimacy has the power to unite us for the purposes of peace, love, and joy. It unites us for healing. Ultimately, the union of souls recognized in spiritual intimacy holds a higher purpose for the relationship and the individuals in it. It brings us together to offer our souls’ contribution to and for the world.

On your journey, allow yourself to innocently explore the wholeness, the fullness of you, the boundlessness and the power of you. And then explore those in connection with another until you know the truth of who you are, until you come face to face with the beauty and love that is humanity – in yourself, in a beloved and in all things. 

*At Ecstatic Intimacy, an all-inclusive website for singles and couples, we welcome all sexual orientation(s), gender(s) and relationship expressions. In this article we utilize the pronouns he/she/him/her.

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