Stop Separating from Love
We all want to be loved AND way too often we run from love… and we don’t even know it.
The same goes for pleasure and joy. We want it and we avoid it simultaneously. The old “one foot on the gas with one foot on the brake” adage applies here. As a matter of fact, I regularly remember Charles Muir, one of my Tantra teachers, asking me and others “How far can you expand your pleasure boundaries?”
Yes! Expanded pleasure is awesome and way too many of us limit our pleasure potential.
I’m inviting you today to look at all the ways you put up boundaries and barriers to love and pleasure. You might say, “Why would I put up a boundary to love?! I totally want to be loved!”
And yet, as much as we might want that love, we still put up barriers to it because we’ve been hurt before and we don’t want to feel that hurt again.
We erect barriers between ourselves and happiness or joy because we’ve been let down and disappointed before and we’re tired of feeling that pain, so we unconsciously decide to skip the joy all together. We’d rather give up dreaming than risk not reaching the dream.
Similarly, we set boundaries to how much pleasure we’ll allow in our lives or in our bodies. Some of us have been conditioned that pleasure is self-centered and self-indulgent and we should never be that way. Others, myself included, limit pleasure because if we really surrender to the pleasure we might lose control… We won’t know what’s going to happen next and that feels too risky… and we put up the boundaries and limits of how much yumminess or ecstasy we will let ourselves enjoy.
It doesn’t matter what area of life we’re considering, sadly we put up barriers and block the things we actually deeply desire. We put up barriers to experiences like love, joy, and pleasure, in order to protect ourselves from potential pain like hurt, disappointment, and the unknown.
Our mind sees this protection as a great idea because the mind wants us to be comfortable and safe. Comfortable is much better than happy, according to the mind. Unfortunately that leaves us hungry… and we wonder why love doesn’t last, why desire wanes, why happiness is elusive.
We push away those amazing experiences in effort to stay safe and comfortable.
I hope you answer “Yes!” to that question, even if it sounds scary. I can tell you it’s worth it!
If you answered yes to that question… or wanted to answer yes, and you know there are fears (and hurts) you need to move beyond so that you can trust and open to your desire for love, joy and pleasure… then I invite you to take advantage of the Chemistry and Connection Extravaganza and apply for a Breakthrough Session with me.
With much much love,
*At Ecstatic Intimacy, an all-inclusive website for singles and couples, we welcome all sexual orientation(s), gender(s) and relationship expressions. In this article we utilize the pronouns he/she/him/her.