The Scary Desire
Do you suffer from “the scary desire?”
Many times when faced with a choice or opportunity, we find ourselves considering every detail, weighing the pros and cons, and trying to “logic” our way through the decision. Unfortunately, we tend not to notice the “sub-routines”, the “sub-conscious programs,” running in our primitive brain that often sabotage our dreams and desires.
As you read on you may discover your own thought processes that block for your own growth…success and dreams. You may recognize where you suffer from the “scary desire” and it might inspire you to take the next steps on your path to love.
It’s sometimes difficult to make changes in our selves and take on new behaviors or activities that are outside of our normal routine… the way of being, you have grown comfortable with.
It may feel like it’s a lot easier, even safer, to stay where you are… with what you know… than to make changes… even if you think the changes might be fantastic!
We might call this the “scary desire” thought process. It means, that regardless of how much you want to change a part of your life… or don’t like your current situation… you at least “know” the situation and you “know” the likely outcomes, pitfalls, and feelings… even if they’re UNdesirable.
You are likely to stay in the undesirable… but COMFORTABLE … known.
While you stay in the comfortable “known”, you have little risk of feeling worse. It’s sad but true… many of us settle for “it can’t get any worse” or we justify stagnant choices with excuses about time, money, the belief that there is nothing more to learn, or that things are “ok.”
If that sounds like you, you’re not alone. Regardless of how great you think change could be… how great you imagine that new love to be… how successful that new career could be… the fear of the unknown (desire) is a powerful driver and is a tool our reptilian survival brain uses masterfully.
People commonly exist in uncomfortable and lonely conditions, simply because they know and understand the current situation and are simply less afraid. They stay in the “present known” even when they KNOW that what is probably behind the “door of change” promises to be better.
This is your survival brain telling you it’s not going to be any better on the other side…
Your brain is not trying to be evil, or even trick you. It is simply doing what it does best… trying to protect you… from it’s perspective, it’s safer staying where you are…even if it doesn’t feel good.
Simply choosing to make one small change in the direction of your goals and desires… even if it’s only a tiny 1% change…can have exponential impact. It doesn’t matter what it is, just make a commitment to change for you…
It is time to move beyond the “scary desire”?
Are you ready to step beyond your comfort zone so you have the chance to have what you truly want in life and in love?
Then take that one small step and if you’re ready for a bigger step… check out our upcoming programs!
Love and blessings,
(Written and inspired with the help of Phil Gilliam, author Bringing the Better Deal)
*At Ecstatic Intimacy, an all-inclusive website for singles and couples, we welcome all sexual orientation(s), gender(s) and relationship expressions. In this article we utilize the pronouns he/she/him/her.