Your Sexuality is a Gift. Are you Giving it?
I’ve truly come to realize this year the essential role our sexuality plays in enjoying a happy, healthy, vibrant, love-filled life… When our lives are that rich, full, and overflowing with pleasure and joy, we have so much to give. Our happiness and the skip in our step make others smile. It reminds them of the joy inside themselves.
You’ve experienced, or a least seen someone else with, that warm, alive, playful glow that has, “I’ve just had amazing sex,” written all over it. We feel so alive in those moments. They can be the moments of our greatest creativity, our greatest generosity, our greatest connections.
Yet life has us busy. Deadlines keep us running. Exhaustion wins over lovemaking.
Do the world a favor this holiday season and connect with your sexuality. If you have a partner, make love with the openness of your heart. Find each other again, even if it’s been years. If you’re single, find something that turns you on… that awakens and raises the sexual energy in you… a book, a movie, a dance, an activity, a conversation, a fantasy. Find something that turns on your juices or raises your erection and just enjoy the pleasure it brings to your body, the smile it can’t help but put on your face, if you’re willing to feel how it really feels.
Best-selling author and TV host, Dr. Oz… says, “As a nation, we are in a sexual famine. Simply put, not enough people are getting down on a daily, weekly or even monthly basis.” He reminds us, “We’re not having sex anymore, and we’re not doing things that bring us vitality and joy of life.”
It’s been documented that we live longer, healthier, happier lives when we’re enjoying quality sex. I say it’s time for us to connect with this powerful life force within ourselves and use it for good. I began a recent talk saying, “What makes you turned-on, alive and passionate in the bedroom is what will make your business turned-on, alive and passionate – making a big contribution to the world.”
Here’s the thing, the more than 40 people in the room got a taste of what it’s like to be on fire with desire, turned on by life… and there wasn’t a touch, a kiss, or a physically intimate moment anywhere to be seen. We were simply beginning to understand that we don’t have to turn off our fire, our juice, our passion when we leave the bedroom.
What would the world be like if we had time and space… if we slowed our drive for more, better, different… and just enjoyed the simple pleasures again… a good hug, a warm drink, a smile and a conversation, a good romp in the hay on Saturday afternoon? Can you find the time?
Women for years have wanted men to connect their heart with their sexuality and sexual impulses. Today, I truly believe it’s time for women to also reconnect their hearts with their sexuality. It’s still true that for most women to be turned-on and fully open sexually, they need to be turned-on in their heart (Men, that’s a hint.) And, women, it seems that many of us at times, sometimes for a few days and sometimes for years or decades, settle just for love. When we do that we’re missing out… missing out on a fundamental source of pleasure, joy, connection, and VITAL energy. Women, it’s time to let this powerful source of energy, love, and joy support us again. It’s not something we can live without… well, we can, but it depends on how you define LIVING.
If something is blocking you – an old hurt, a physical pain or challenge, not trusting it’s safe, shame, confusion, lack of knowledge – I don’t care what it is…
I invite you… I implore you… to clear the roadblocks… to reawaken the vibrant, alive, creative, expressed, passionate you… to gift yourself the abundant pleasure, the spiritual awakening power, the vitality that comes with reawakening and expressing your sexuality.
I invite you to offer that gift to your beloved… your alive awakened sexuality… and if it doesn’t feel so alive anymore, then simply give him or her the gift of your willingness to re-explore it… to open to the possibilities.
I invite you to give the world the gift of your passion, your excitement, your turn-on, your joy. The world needs more of our pleasure right now. We’ve held too much pain, too much loss. I wonder what would change if we found the time, space, and energy to enjoy, to truly re-connect with each other — our deepest hearts with our families, our bodies and hearts with our beloveds, our passion and commitment to happiness, joy and healing with our neighbors, friends… the world.
I wonder what would happen…
In love, light and ecstasy,
*At Ecstatic Intimacy, an all-inclusive website for singles and couples, we welcome all sexual orientation(s), gender(s) and relationship expressions. In this article we utilize the pronouns he/she/him/her.